by Bev Seal
Let’s start at the very beginning…
As a wise woman once said, it’s a very good place to start! And why settle for a wedding that isn’t ‘you’? Make it your own and boss your big day.
Wherever you are in your planning process for your wedding, it’s always good to stop and check and remind yourselves why you are getting married in the first place. It’s easy to get caught up in big celebrations and huge ideas and forget that we now get married by choice, we don’t have to do this! !
What made you want to make this commitment? What is it that has made your partner… the one? Tell each other, remind each other, write it down if you can’t say it, get back to basics and stop arguing over a colour theme or your guest list (don’t lie, you know you did)!
Go back to your beginning, when you met, how you met, and remind yourselves why you are on this journey and now consider: does your wedding day reflect who you are as a couple? Is it what YOU want? I am assuming if you are reading this beautifully alternative blog, you are looking for something different for your big day. Well, you are 100% in the right place but it helps to have an idea of what you might be looking for in the first place in order to boss your big day!
Boss your big day by considering your style…
You may have a theme and style already in mind – maybe your theme is how you and your partner met or a hobby you enjoy together, maybe you are totally stuck for an idea and have come here for help and inspiration! A good place to start, if you are wondering what direction to take your big day in, is to ask your friends and family to describe you as a couple, maybe a few key words or a sentence. Ask them what they think of when they think of you and this might give you some inspiration (you’ll also learn who your friends are in the process and who to take off the guest list!).
It’s easy to get thrown into a routine for weddings, some venues have strict timings/order of day policies but if you can, have you thought about changing it up a bit? If you are having a celebrant led ceremony (which I HIGHLY recommend for an alternative wedding) there are no rules for how to plan a wedding! Why not have your ceremony after dinner? Or during? You don’t have to stick to a traditional format for your day, or you can mix traditional with alternative! Why not have your ceremony with speeches and toasts included, then you have the rest of the day to just relax and enjoy (hot tip – you’re welcome)!
Are you looking to incorporate some traditions, have you considered where they come from? Most of our wedding traditions come from places that are no longer relevant. Did you know brides used to carry bouquets to cover their smell as hygiene was not great many years ago! Or wear a veil to cover their face so their groom (who they had never met before) didn’t do a runner before saying ‘I do’!
Traditions are lovely and if you want to stick with them, that’s great. Just know you don’t have to! Weddings are changing, couples are changing. Most people I know have been together for a while and sometimes have kids before getting married which is a far cry from just 50–60 years ago when that was hugely frowned upon. Make your own traditions, rip up the rule book and go for it. You as a couple are unique and your day should be too.
This wedding is your choice and your day. It’s also your money! Even if you are down the line with your planning, it’s not too late to shake things up, grab a copy of Outrageous Bride, and get dreaming!
Bev Seal is a Wedding Planner, Coordinator, and advisor who specialises in alternative weddings as well as weddings in historical and unusual buildings. Bev has been operating in the wedding industry for the last 5 years. She is also a performer and historical reenactor both outside and inside of work. Find Bev at QQW Weddings.